Mini-Van Confessions

I have decided to start something new. It will be a series of posts that I will title "Mini-Van Confessions". I am sure most of you have seen "Taxi-Cab Confessions" . . . I promise the stories I share won't be as scandalous as the late-night series on HBO. I try to keep this blog as PG as possible, except for when the few-and-far-between "mild profanities" slip out - when the blog is temporarily bumped up to a PG-13 rating.



These "mom" confessions will be things that I simply need to get off my chest, and hopefully something that other moms can relate to . . .





I confess:





that I do not like Soccer . . . in fact, I may just hate it! Why on God's green earth did I ever think that signing up my 5-year-old for an organized sport was ever really necessary? I teach this age kids every day, and know their "capabilities". I honestly and truly believe that organized sports at this level is a waste of time, energy and money! Why, oh why, did I make this mistake?!

Sure, Ella looks adorable in her little Soccer uniform, complete with shin guards. It's cute to watch her practice . . . for about 10 minutes. Then I am over it. For the next 50 minutes, I sit there and wonder what the hell we are doing there. The kids are trying really hard to do a skill that is too hard for them at their age. They are also jam-packed on a very small field . . . so when you put a bunch a kids who have no ball control on a too-small field, all they can do is kick it twice, and then it goes outside the boundary every. single. time. Plus, since it is a Spring and Fall league, it's usually freezing cold, which makes it that much better.

(Claire thinks it's hard to be a spectator, too)



Then there is always the mom-who-makes-you-want-to-puke sitting right next to me who is lovingly cheering her daughter on, just gushing on how cute everything is. Please. She must drink her dinner. At least that's what I tell myself to make me feel better.

But I will do what any mother would do. Put on a smiley face and give Ella an enthusiastic thumbs-up every time she looks over at me. At least Ella is enjoying herself!





Oh, and did I mention? Their games are at 9:00 am on Saturday mornings. The ONE day I don't have to set my alarm . . . . frinkin' soccer.


I do own a mini van. I'm in my 30's. I have 3 kids. But a Soccer Mom, I am not.